Chapter Nine - Big Boy Beaver

Finally the beavers had decided to do some actual scouting. It’s not like I didn’t like making crafts and play-acting, I did - but it’s not real scouting. Real scouting is tying knots, starting fires, hiking and most importantly camping! When I heard about an annual camping trip I was desperate to go. I was giddy with excitement! Taylor even told me I had to calm down.

I should have known it wasn’t going to be real camping when we arrived at the log cabin in the middle of the woods. A tent wasn't even on the list of things to bring. Dad dropped me off, and after a brief conversation with Taylor promised he would see me soon. I just nodded excitedly, waving him goodbye. I’d done plenty of cub scout camps in the past after all, and I was well past getting home sick. There I stood in a dorm room filled with bunk beds. It looked like I was one of the first to arrive. I spied a corner bed and tossed my bag onto the top, thinking I could at least be on the top bunk if I wasn’t gonna get to sleep in a tent.

I counted on my fingers, quickly realizing there weren’t enough beds. This trip was supposed to be a ‘linking event’ where we would do activities with the Cub Scouts, but where were they going to sleep? I didn’t actually know any Cub Scouts other than Zach, but he had told me about a couple of them. Honestly, I was pretty worried about meeting them. Three of them were supposed to be my age - my real age. I was going to be traipsing around decked out in my dorky hat and vest with some of my future classmates. I just hoped they wouldn’t remember.

Looking around, I saw that some other Beavers had trickled in and were dropping off their stuff. It was just Bobcats so far. Laurie had told me his mom was bringing him, Zach, Alex and Charlie all together, so I guess I could expect them to all arrive at once. I climbed up to the bunk and opened my bag. I had attached Wubbie to one of the zipper pulls, if only to prove to Laurie that I really did like his birthday gift. I had actually brought it with me to a few things - the little wolf stuffie a regular companion hanging from my belt loop. Wubbie had come with us tree planting, paper airplane racing, even to that silly puppet show Taylor had taken us to at the town library. A few of the Beavers in the other lodge had similar Bobcat stuffies hooked on their belts, but the accessory still made me look even littler than my Beaver uniform already suggested. Still, I carried him religiously - just to keep Laurie happy.

My boy scouts bag was probably too big for this little adventure, but I would use any excuse to use it. I had my change of clothes, a blanket, and multiple flashlights - both a hand held one and a head lamp. Beside all that stuff was my ‘summer homework’. To be perfectly honest I had no intention of bringing it at all, but I was so behind that mom had insisted I take the reading assignment. I took out the book and crammed it into my cargo shorts pocket. It stuck out a little, but the uncomfortable bulk of it would at least help me remember to actually read it.

All ready, I made my way to the main room where we were all supposed to gather. There were a few Cub Scouts and Beavers sitting at mess hall tables chatting amongst themselves. I hovered for a moment, feeling a little nervous without the Kindies, when I saw a familiar blond haired boy skip in through the door.

“Cooper!” Laurie shouted and bounded toward me to give me a hug. I returned it without thinking.

“Hey Laurie.” I said and then lowered my voice. “I picked the bunk in the corner, you should take the bottom.”

Laurie nodded his agreement, ushering for me to follow him back with Alex and Charlie into the dorm room. Zach was wearing his standard Cub Scout uniform, but had opted for a red neckerchief today. He tossed his own bag into a pile with the other Cub scouts.

Taylor waited for everyone to finally gather back in the main room before he addressed us. “Hello everyone, it’s great to see you all so excited for camp this year. You all know me. I’m the Beaver leader Malak and beside me is our Cub Scout leader Akela.” Taylor announced. A stocky woman with black hair tied into a ponytail stood next to him, holding a large box full of clipboards. “Beavers, this is the Cub’s Kim over from scouts - her name is Kianna.” Taylor went on. She was a girl perhaps a year or two older than me with black braided hair, a green scout shirt, and a red neckerchief. She gave a broad smile over toward where I was standing with the Kindies. Zach made a nervous peep, averting his eyes. “I also want you to know about Nate, the Cub Pack’s Sixer.” Taylor waited for a boy wearing the same outfit as Zach to stand up. He had black hair combed neatly and was chewing gum, eyes averted uncaringly to the ceiling. He crossed his arms, looking rather bored. “Lastly, someone who everyone already knows is Zach our colonies’ Keeo” There was a beat of silence before Taylor cast an expectant look over at the cub scout “Zach?”

The boy flushed red, breaking out of his daydream and shooting to his feet “Yep…I’m here!” he squeaked.

Taylor chuckled, rolling his eyes. “That’s all from me. Over to Akela.”

“The first activity of the day is called Squirrel Hunt.” the cub leader began, “Cubs will be paired with a beaver and you will navigate your way around the trail to pick up items for a diorama. Just remember that you’re not to pick any living plants.”

Just then, Laurie poked me in the tummy and I let out an involuntary giggle, still trying to focus on what Akela was saying. “Coop, you forgot Wubbie.” He whispered in my ear.

“No I didn’t, he’s on my backpack.” I told him.

Laurie produced the stuffed toy. “I brought him out for you,” He whispered.

I grabbed it, a little annoyed that all the cub scouts would now see the babyish toy. “Uh thanks.” I sputtered awkwardly, clipping him to my belt loop.

Taylor and Akela led us to the edge of the trail and handed out a clipboard to each Cub Scout, reading out who everyone was paired with. Laurie was with Nate, and Zach was with Alex. I saw Bradley was assigned to one of the bobcats, and eventually all the Beavers were paired except for me and Charlie. “What about us?” the white tail asked.

Taylor winked at me. “I think you two can manage this together, don’t you Charlie?” He then handed him the clipboard showing a simple map with an attached compass.

“Yes sir!” Charlie agreed immediately, though he was clutching the clipboard so tight his knuckles had turned white. “I can do it!” he squeaked, clearly a little nervous.

Taylor nodded. “I know you can, take care of Coop, alright.” He told him and patted his head.

Without asking, Charlie took my hand - keeping me tethered close by as he explained the map in a rather patronizing tone. Though the concept of a key and a scale were hardly news to me, I grinned and bore it, not wanting to make him feel bad. According to Charlie, we were supposed to make a simple loop around the trail and collect items listed on the sheet. Without delay we rushed off into the woods.

The game was pretty easy. Following the trail, we managed to collect all the items on the list. We had a twig with a fork in it, three round pebbles, a whole handful of pine needles - everything except an oak leaf.

“They’re the ones with lobes sticking out from the middle.” Charlie explained sagely, showing me the picture printed on the worksheet “Like lots of little ears!”

I already knew what an oak leaf looked like, but I nodded along gratefully all the same; offering my white-tailed companion a deferential smile. “Cool.”

“You gotta know how to identify leaves and stuff for your Scoutcraft badge.” he went on, tapping a little square patch on his vest. “I can teach you more, if you want.”

I frowned. The last thing I wanted was a tutoring session from a seven year old. I glanced away, eager to change the subject. “I don’t see any oak leaves…”

“Yeah…” Charlie agreed, peering through the undergrowth. Suddenly, he seemed to spot something, letting out a delighted yip and scuttling off of the proscribed trail into a thicket of gnarled leaves and branches.

Despite myself, I felt a sudden rush of fear at the prospect that I might be left all alone. I thundered after him, calling desperately for him to slow down. “Charlie?” I squeaked. “Where are you going?” I ground to a halt, breathing haggardly in and out as I searched for any sign of the seven year old. To my annoyance however, the brown beaver vest seemed to act as the perfect camouflage amongst the tangle of sepia shrubbery. “Charlie!” I called out again, feeling a little tremble in my voice. I shivered, an uneasy feeling tingling up my spine. Just then, I spotted a sudden flash of white at the periphery of my vision.

“Boo!” Charlie shouted in my ear, making me jump half out of my skin. I whirled around, the white-tail boy breathless with laughter at the sight of my sheet-white terrified face.

“You scared me!” I pouted, whacking him weakly against the shoulder. “Don’t do that.”

“Sorry!” he giggled amiably, tickling a slightly browned old oak leaf under my chin. “But look!” he pointed behind us, a large solitary oak tree standing in the middle of a claustrophobic clearing - dropped leaves scattered all around. “It’s an Oregon white oak!”

I let out a deep breath, calming myself. “Nice. But we weren’t really meant to leave the trail...”

“It’s alright.” Charlie shrugged. “I remember the way we went.”

Just as he was about to charge back into the bush we’d both just burst through, my eyes widened in surprise as I registered the shape of the leaves, remembering an old boy scout adage - ‘leaves of three, let it be’. “Stop!” I shouted, grabbing on to the tail of Charlie’s vest.

“Huh?”

“That’s poison ivy!” I grabbed his hand, yanking him back towards the clearing with the oak. “Look, it’s all over the way we came.”

Charlie frowned, inspecting the plant himself. “Are you sure?” he asked. “How do you…?”

“It just is.” I insisted, speaking with the authority of a hardened Webelo despite the brown tail status I’d found myself demoted to. “Did any of it touch your skin?” I demanded, making him hold out his hands.

“I don’t think so…” Charlie peeped uneasily, though he didn’t sound all too confident, the bewildered crack in his voice making the heroic Kindie leader sound more like a blubbering kindergartener on the edge of a tearful tantrum.

“Me neither.” I agreed, baring up bravely. “It’s alright. We just need to find some other way back to the trail.”

“Right.” Charlie said, swallowing his nerves. He referred to his clipboard frantically trying to get the compass to work. “It’s okay Coop, no need to be scared! I have my second trail skills badge.” He tapped on the little square badge with a footprint on it.

Charlie desperately spun the map around looking for more information, but it really only showed locations on the trail - and even those in sparse detail. I surveyed our surroundings. The side of the clearing from which we had come was completely covered in poison ivy. We’d be lucky if we didn’t need calamine lotion later on. Still, the other edges of the clearing seemed fine. If we just made our way up the hill, we should have been able to get around it.

“Uh Charlie.” I said, trying to get his attention.

“Don’t worry Cooper.” Charlie shrieked and took my hand. “Just hold onto me.” He said, clutching my hand far too tightly. Charlie pulled me along through the increasingly dense bush. “H-How did you know about the poison ivy?” He asked with a tremble in his voice.

I tried to keep up with him as he pushed through tree branches, trying to make his way to another clearing up ahead. “Boy Scouts.” I said with a grunt as we stumbled into a clearing near a creek. “Is this creek on the map?” I asked him.

“Nooo.” Charlie sniveled with tears filling his eyes. “I got us lost.” he wailed.

I looked at him with concern, remembering how Taylor had winked at me right before he left. Was he trying to tell me to look after Charlie? He knew I was eleven after all, and all the other groups had a cub scout around my age. I frowned, considering if I should simply take over and get us back to the trail. It couldn’t be that hard, could it? I looked around the clearing but nothing seemed to be part of anything. “Charlie, we’ll be okay. it’s only been a minute.” I tried to reassure him, a few droplets forming in the corners of my own eyes. What was wrong with me? The last thing we needed was two kids crying!

Charlie furrowed his brow, the look on my face seeming to have an affect on him. He took a big sniff, bared his teeth, and wiped away his own. “Okay Charlie, it’s time to be a big boy.” He told himself, clenching his fists and sounding like a practiced boxer psyching himself up before a big fight. “I need to take care of everyone now.” He continued.

“Charlie?” I said, blinking away my bleary vision. “You okay.” I carefully asked.

“I’m okay.” Charlie sniveled, but he didn’t sound it. He let go of my hand, wiping away tears with the palms of his hands. “Daddy, said I needed to be a big boy.”

I’d known Charlie a couple months now, but he had only ever talked about his mom. I didn’t even know his Dad was around. He always seemed so dependable and driven that it was disturbing to see him so upset. Even with tears streaming down his cheeks however, he seemed determined to stay strong - pounding his fists against his side in a strange display of junior machismo. I took his hand, holding it steady. “Charlie, It’s okay.” I tried to reassure him, considering if it was finally time to end this charade and tell the truth. “I’m a big boy too.” I blurted out. I cringed. Why had I said it like that?

Charlie looked at me, managing to summon a big brother’s comforting smile despite the tears streaking down his face. “I know Coop.” He hiccuped. “You’re being very brave.” He praised me. “Let’s keep g-going.”

He led me over the creak and we started climbing a hill. After a little while, I had lost track of where the original oak tree was. If we weren’t before, we were definitely lost now. “Charlie, I think we are wandering further away from the trail.” I tried to tell him, and pulled him to a stop.

“We are lost!” Charlie cried. “I’m only making it w-worse” He sniveled again and sat down on a log.

I gulped, trying to rationalize the situation. It hadn’t been that long. Taylor would surely send someone to look for us if we didn’t turn up soon. I started to get a little emotional as well, Charlie’s uncharacteristic meltdown making me want to go back to crying along with him. “Charlie.” I said not knowing the words. “Someone will come looking for us.” I told him.

“No one’s coming!” Charlie shouted with some vitriol. I was taken off guard, so shocked that my pent up tears finally began to stream down my face. “It’s just me and you, and you’re only little. You just have to follow me. I’m a big boy, I can do it.” He quivered. “D-d-daddy said so.”

I stayed silent, the whole situation making me feel very uncomfortable. We were both crying now, but Charlie seemed way more upset then he should. Why was he so concerned with being a ‘big boy’? Isn’t that something you say when you’re really little? “Charlie, you are a big boy.” I told him trying to calm him down, though it felt weird to say.

Charlie started wailing even harder than I expected, more than he should. “I want my Daddy!” He cried and hiccuped. “I can’t do it!” He wailed.

I wrapped my arms around Charlie and squeezed. “Charlie it’s okay, we will call your Dad later.” I tried to reassure him, but this only seemed to make him more upset.

Charlie hung onto me. “We can’t, he’s gone!” He sobbed, holding on tighter and crying into my shoulder. “I’m s’posed to be in ch-charge, Daddy said so”

I swallowed and squeezed him back harder. “Charlie, it’s okay. You’re not in charge.” I told him. “I’m not that little.”

“You’re not?” He sniveled.

I paused. I was just about to tell him the truth - the whole truth - but a lingering doubt stopped me in my tracks. What if I made things worse? In the end, I chose a half measure. “I’m eight.” I blurted out. When had I decided that? It wasn’t too far off my age, more believable than five, and still young enough to be a beaver.

“Y-your eight?” Charlie asked, calming down.

“Y-yeah.” I quivered through my lie. “Just don’t tell anyone - it’s kinda like a secret. Taylor made a mistake when I joined and…” I trailed off, thinking it easier to leave the details unsaid. “Whatever. Just don’t tell anyone, ‘kay?”

Charlie nodded and wiped away his tears. “So we are both in charge?” He said and sniffed.

“Sure.” I agreed, giving an uneasy smile and playfully, yet still rather timidly, tapping the younger boy in the side with my elbow “So chill out!” I exclaimed, trying to sound upbeat.

“Oh…kay.” Charlie sighed, blinking back his blurry vision and once again holding up his compass - focusing his eyes on the tool as if to distract himself from his overwhelming torrent of emotion.

I cocked my head, still rather concerned about the whole situation. Why had Charlie been so hung up on being a ‘big boy?’ And what did he mean about his Dad? I followed cautiously behind as he took a few tentative steps back the way we had come, feeling Wubbie bouncing against my thigh. I unclipped the toy from my belt, stroking tenderly on its soft fur as we studied the map together beneath the shelter of a large pine tree. “Do you want to hold him?” I eventually offered, making the little wolf cub prance playfully across Charlie’s clipboard in an effort to cheer him up.

“Huh? Oh…no thank you.” Charlie sniffed. “I mean, I’m fine now. I was just being stupid.”

“It’s alright.” I reassured. “I know it's kinda silly, but it makes me feel better.”

The seven year old pursed his lips as if considering, but then went back to staring at the map, stubbornly shaking his head. “No, I’m okay.” he shuddered. “Seriously.”

I shrugged, reattaching Wubbie to my belt. I couldn’t really blame Charlie for being embarrassed, but it wasn’t like I was going to tell anyone! Laurie had somehow compelled me to carry the childish toy everywhere I went like a toddler’s security blanket. Now that I’d convinced him I was eight, I couldn’t help but wonder what Charlie thought about my newest accessory. Was eight too old to carry around a stuffed animal? Eleven certainly was! Did he think I was some kind of wuss? I felt a familiar sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach, but tried not to think about it. I was being stupid! Of course Charlie liked me - and now he thought I was just as grown up as he was, even if that was still three years younger than my actual age.